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Friday, December 25, 2009
hey, this is a real post after ice age. :D I updated the songs but i cant hear it, idk why. I wonder if you all can, or is it my com has prob? Can someone ans me? I shall do a bit of update by a bit. For now, i only wan to say i really dun wan to go back to school and start sec 3. I dun hv a choice but i really dont wan to. I dun even wan to touch my precious hw. It is pathetically half way done, or u can consider it as not done. wadever...i really dun wan to do. But it is driving me mad, always having to think of that untouched hw. Why do we have to suffer such terrible fate even though it is HOLIDAY? bleh... churn churn churn....trying to churn out the concept map, which is equals actually copying everything out from the tb. Redo-ing LA equals to jus recopying everything and change a little here and there. Well, it is still not that easy but i seriously lack motivation. As usual, i wasted my whole holiday, idk on what. 2 wks of china immersion, a few outings with friends, quite a lot of shopping trips with parents, finished reading 1 bk, and plenty of time stoning. :D That's my holiday. Oh ya, and a few trainings. :D It's end of christmas! timing gang gang hao! Gdnite! Saturday, November 7, 2009
同样是拥抱, 同样是声再见, 但一切已不会再一样。 你和我已回不了当初, 从此以后,我只能默默地在一旁守护你。 希望有一天你会明白我对你的关心, 也请你记得我对你的爱是永不退色的, 对你的承诺是依然那么真实的。 期盼再次看到你美丽的微笑, 祝你幸福。 Thursday, October 22, 2009
One update per month, this is pathetic actually. Ok, so exams are over....but i dun feel the joy....idk why. I just feel tad there is plenty of time for me to waste...but so wad? But this one month was a tough period for me...i m like fighting with myself...i dun feel like studying but i hv to. I hope i win...i hv a good feeling abt it. But who knows? My feeling is most of the time not right. But there are times when they are accurate and very accurate even. :D But i m glad that the battle is over! :D I can finally sleep peacefully. Know wad? I woke up myself on a few mornings when i hv exams. It is like u hv this kind of pressure and u feel that u hv to wake up. N i had a dream one night. It was not a nightmare, but i wasnt good. Someone said something which made me ponder for quite sometime. It is a sad sentence. But forget it...it is nt that impt either. Ytd went out with xx and wingshan to watch 500 days of summer at vivo. I hv to admit that it is pretty boring....there's not really a storyline, jus a lot of feelings. Not funny, not sad (or is it that i cant feel it?) I think the main thing that the director or storywriter or wadever wants to portray is jus there is no such thing as fate. It doesnt come across strongly in the story (at least i dun think so), but it was like mention a lot of times at the end. And after summer it is autumn!!! :D But who knows how long will autumn last? 到底是偶然还是必然呢? Then we walk around randomly until i was really tired. My legs were like dying when i got home. I wondered wad happen to all my trainings? I really nid to train alr. It is like i hvnt train at all for abt 1 month. Then plus all the junk food that i hv eaten ytd and today....haiz.... Today went back to sch for drama...i like beverlyn! :D Her acting is good, the feeling is so correct! :p Lol...wad am i talking abt? Anw, i m in charge of lights n there were a lot of confusion. I think the timing is so wrong...straight after EOYs , then everything have to rush like siao! We jus finished exams, my dear teachers!!! It is like i went back to sch at the usual time today...very very tired....I was like struggling to pull myself out of the bed. N i missed the bus and was late. Not that anyone cares anyway. I m not that impt. :D After the rehearsal, I went to Macdonalds (now u know why i nid to exercise) with xx, yunling and yimin. :) As we ate, we starting talking about 2012, how the world will end. We are sort of convince by now that the world is really gonna end at 2012. We started going into Nuclear war and then all the politics of the different countries. And the conclusion is that: The world is confusing n whichever reasons that result in the the world ending will be all human's own fault and we shldnt blame anyone. I dun mind the world ending actually, i mean if everyone dies together, it is sort of nice too. Maybe i m getting a little sadistic....idk. The only thing that i hope is that i dun suffer a painful death. Ok, this is getting way off. So, i hv written a post! :D Haha...random. But i really dunno who is reading so i m not interested in updating. I nid inspiration and encouragement ot update. :D Sunday, September 20, 2009
i m getting panicky by the day.... because i can foresee my future.... if i dun start doing what i am supposed to do now.... which is.... STUDYING!!!! Goddamit! This is stupidly crappy....i dun wan to study!!!!!!! But i cant remember a single thing if i dun study....i think the only subjects i can skip is perhaps, chi, LA, and maybe chem (if my brain dun throw away those essential stuff in weeks to come). Actually bio also can dun study, i m pretty confident abt bio after doing all those papers. I dun mean full marks to be confident, jus abt 85% is enuf. I m not a perfectionist in times of crisis. I m a flexible person. so yeah... The %age of stuff that still remains in my brain: Geog---5% Hist---10% Physics---2% Math---50% Yay!!! Congrats to myself...at least i m happy that it is not 0%. I think my blog is facing a mid-life crisis...or is it memopause, since it is not producing wad it is supposed to for a damn long time? Ok...it sounds wrong... Tired tired as usual...i realised the more i slept, the more tired i become. I slept at almost 12 on mon night, and felt perfectly fine on tues. I slept at 10 on tues night and felt like dying today? What kind of logic is this? I m constantly reminded of the EOYs and all the hw.... I m tired....really really tired....partially cuz of sth else, i hv to face it at least once or twice per day, not sure whether i wan it or not...mixing hope and disappointment and happiness and excitement is not a good feeling u know? I dun wan to study...i really really dun wan to study.... I shall end off by saying....i m not caring whether i fail or pass my EOYs... I jus wan to say...i will jus say i m gonna try my best and use as much of my remaining energy as possible... ~written in a period of anxiety and helplessness~ Monday, August 17, 2009
hmm....i can sense that i m in grave danger right now....actually I M in grave danger right now. I m in a huge risk of not being able to finish my Chi SIA on time. Ever since block test, i can never get back to the studying mood, not even the homework mood. I cant control, the desire to stray off to somewhere else is too strong. Esp. when doing chi sia i nid the com, it is even worse. I hvnt edit all my 5 pieces of work, not to mention the deco. But i hv done the cover pg, qian yan and the jie lun. Which is kind of bad, i cant bring myself to start reading the pieces and get myself settled into what i nid to do, which is kind of a lot? Not only these 5 pieces, still hv the yue du ka and the yue du bao gao all not done. The problem is all the materials are there, but i jus dun hv the correct attitude and mindset to say that i nid to start working on it. And there goes another day wasted in front of the com.... I cant stand it myself, i dunno wad is wrong...i m in deep trouble. I cant concentrate on the correct stuff but i can on the wrong stuff. Currently, i m very hardwork-ingly reading my new moon. I m reading it like in a lightning speed, cuz u know wad speed i am always reading right? And in a few days i finish like 300+ pages, which is like 'WOW'! It is amazing how i did it, so u can imagine the amt of time i spent reading the book. Haiz...pathetic me. I think i m suffering a mental breakdown, jus that i m not very aware of it. Maybe it is kind of internal. Forever tired of everything. Therefore, when i said tht i have had enuf of everything, i sort of meant it too. Depression. There are not really any event tht i wan to rmb these few days. Lots of holidays which is kind of gd since i m not in the mood for studying. :D But that didnt get me anywhere, except finishing twilight and going through new moon. There are 3 things tht i can nvr really make sense out of them. First, idea of time. Second, directions. Third, shapes. If u ask me to do sth within this time, i can almost tell u immediately that i can only finish it like last minute unless it is sth i enjoy. If u ask me directions, u can be sure u r gonna get lost. Even i manage to tell u some direction, take it with a pinch of salt. N figuring out left and right would take me abt 2 secs. Shapes....i cant really tell wad shape sth is unless it is very obvious. That's why generally if i find sth ugly or beautiful, it is jus a feeling, i dunno why either. I cant tell whether yr features are big or small unless ppl tell me, then i would try to figure sth out of it. That's quite an interesting fact abt me...the blur blur side. :D Oh...the funfair. Haha, our form teachers hv not really found out wad kind of class we really are huh? Come on, getting 2 shocks in less than 24 hrs jus because of the funfair? Praying tad a miracle will happen and the miracle, or so they thought, really did happen. Our class is always like that isnt it? No matter how much problems we hv, in the end we will solve it. At most we will jus makedo with wad we hv. I guess tad is the strength of 203. Last minute rush isnt the worse thing ever. Almost all of our class projects are done last minute. Of course they are always not very successful but we are improving. This yr is so much better than the last. Idk wad happened but it is true. :D 1 yr of experience cause great difference. In one way or another. Sometimes, i really love 203. Hoho...tmr is the interclass chinese debate thingy. Hope that 203 can get through to the nxt round. Actually i m pretty sure they will. i mean jus look at the amt of time they spent, or we spent together practicing and preparing for it. Plus, we totally practice till all of the practice team's points collapsed. Therefore, 203 is strong. :D i m not saying whichever class that is gonna take us on is weak but i hv the confidence in 203. But if 203 gets into the nxt round, all the trouble of practicing and preparing with them is gonna start all over again. Hv u got any idea how tiring the process is? Is like we are this big board for the debators to shoot at us and stab us with thousands and millions of arrow. Although occasionally the arrow missed and our soldiers could shoot one arrow across back to the other end. U hv no idea how brain dead i was after the first practice. I totally wanted to raise white flag and surrender. I even told the last speaker to jus say tad we lost alr, dun nid to continue anymore. That was how pathetic we, the practice team, are and how strong i think the debators are. This is part propaganda. :D Ok, i nidda start reading my first piece of chi sia, although it is kind of late alr. My eyelids are heavy and they are closing...my brain too...goodnite. Friday, August 7, 2009
ho...here for another post after this long long time away from keyboard. Actually not really. Anw, block tests are over! i m happy. but i shldnt be. i think my block test is terribly done. Although i really put in effort to revise. But rmb stuff on the ppt and putting it into use in the papers are 2 very diff things. Plus there is this external condition call time limit. :( I didnt finish 3 papers: hist, la and math. Although i m not going to say i m going to fail any papers but passing jus isnt good enuf for me. Math and science is sort of like sure gone 8 marks each. I wont pin much hope on hist since i totally did it in a rush, even my handwriting was terrible. I think the most confident paper is chinese? although it is not really well done either. maybe geog? but basically i wrote rubbish for last 2 qns for geog. sian.. today had national day celebration. Overall quite happy. Pon trng again. this is like the how many time in term 3 alr. At least the 3rd or 4th time alr. I m a bad gal. But there are stuff that are more impt to me as compared to cca. So my cca had to compromise. Oh...the celebration. Beverlyn is our mascot bee for today's celebration. :D So cute! Haha. We all had feelers too! Haha...even mr tan had it but in a weird way. Everyone was taking pictures of their werid self. I mean it is not often u get feelers on yr head right? Oh...the NE quiz. I realised something. The ans of at least 2 of the qns that we got them wrong were given by mr tan. He assumed it is correct so we didnt "check" it. 1 was the mediacorp qns, 2nd was the prime minister hving another job b4 being a prime minister. the 2nd qns our ans or mr tan's ans was george yeo when GEORGE YEO WAS NEVER OUR PRIME MINISTER!!! In history, we only had 3 prime ministers to date! But i only rmb that after i saw the ans for that qns. Although i knew all along GEORGE YEO WAS NEVER OUR PRIME MINISTER!!! Nvm...i didnt say anything too. N i saw the exttreme of some ppl today. so extra till i still feel uncomfortable now. Hv been fb-ing for practically the whole day. Level up for pet society and restaurant city. haha. Childish me. But the only reason i joined fb was for the games. Until now, it is still the same. I was totally totally stuck in it to an extreme state. I cant be bothered to do anything else at all. i m very tired now....oh..i think wingshan enjoyed herself at the bbq at miss yeo's hse? i too busy to reply her so i shall not care. Nidda start on chem sia and chi sia soon. Hate it. And joey, dun u dare tag that u hv finished yr chi sia! I m too weak to know that somebody has finished her chi sia. maybe her chem sia too. Spare me the terror. Oh crap...my restaurant is not loading!!! I nidda shut it first! Saturday, July 18, 2009
hohoho, this is my 111th post. yay! wad a nice number. :D Hasnt post for a really really long time. i know my blog is dead. I m almost dead too u see. i hvnt come on9 for a few days alr. N i came on9 to do the geog as. Ok, i really hv to say this. THE GEOG MAP IS REALLY UNCLEAR!!! Even if i had the colour version. Although it is definitely better than the one printed, it is still very unclear and u really hv to magnify it. Whatever. Sucky life. All i can ever say is that i m tired. Pathetically tmr, i hv to find my way to botanical garden for some terranium workshop and i mus reach at 9 in the morning! WTH! and i m not even very sure where botanical garden is, let alone the shitty classroom! What kind of logic is it to ask us to go by ourselves and to find the classroom in that big big garden!!!! WTH! Oh, today we had our class breakfast. Didnt really enjoy it, such another eating session in the canteen with more variety of food and more brainstorming than usual. Is there a point? I mean like it was supposed to bond the class, but i didnt really see any bonding. But we took a class photo, which is like one of the very very very few class photos that we took together. i think in total, there were not more than 5 photos taking as a whole class. Some things jus cant be achieved, cuz ppl really dun wan to. It is just as simple as that. isnt it? Then the long long day past and the last lesson was dance. As usual, my sense of direction was rottenly rotten. I totally got the steps wrong and cant be bothered abt it. I mean i really really very bad in directions. I nid to think for 2 secs which is left and which is right. Not to mention that i hv to cordinate my left leg and right leg together with my left hand and right hand. It is jus too diff for me. That's why i can never be a dancer. Mdm oehlers was wrong. haha. And i went for trng. As usual, my leg hurts. But the unusual thing is, my ankle started to hurt. Obviously sth is very wrong, but idk wad. :( Although it is not the first time my ankle hurts, this time is more severe. It shld be dance class's fault. Oh, another usual thing is that there was a lot of sick stuff with dorcas blabbering rubbish abt infertility. It all started because chloe mentioned that frog jump is banned in our sch but we were still jumping like ytd? Haha, a lot of laughter but tiring. As usual, mr lim was full of crap. Combination of mr lim and dorcas chang = a lot a lot a lot of crap! :D After a tiring day/wk/ month, i need to go recharge my energy. To put it simply, i nidda go sleep now. Hopefully tmr will be a better day since i m going to xy's hse for the chem SIA. Ok, i can alr foresee that tmr will be a sad day with chem! |